i have nowhere to really vent so sorry for coming on here and trauma dumping but i need to get it out.
i hate how now you both want to be parents. now that i don’t need you. i hate that i want to give in but something doesn’t let me. i haven’t called in a week. i know you’ve noticed but as long as you stay with him then the distance is only going to get bigger.
it’s too late for apologies and to make amends. years too late.
i don’t think people understand how much of life is grief. not just people dying, but losing the version of yourself you thought you’d become. grieving the city you had to leave. the friends you lost not in argument, but in silence. the summer that will never come back. the feeling that maybe you peaked at 12 when you were reading books under the covers and believing in forever
